DECORATION OR MISGUIDED DESECRATION?

In a nutshell, Wikipedia gives this information about the suburb where I live: “Parkview is a suburb of Johannesburg, South Africa. It borders the suburb of Greenside and overlooks Zoo Lake, a park which lies on the opposite side of Jan Smuts Avenue from the Johannesburg Zoo. All of its streets are named after Irish…

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NOEL 2011 REDUX

The book was an early Christmas gift from my husband. I read it in the early morning, in the garden while the rest of the house was asleep. Do you know the smell of Nivea body lotion? That is the scent that came in waves from the moonflowers I planted two years ago, cuttings from…

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SELF-PORTRAIT IN ROSY BELLIBUTTON

WordPress weekly photo challenge: Self Portrait. In her book, The Thornbirds, Colleen McCullough describes a dress-fabric in a shade of ‘ashes of roses’. I was entranced and it became my personal favourite palette forever, with periodic and brief forays into brights. But I always return to pastels… Montage on my office noticeboard: Thirty-two and forty-seven….

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I AM WELTEVREDEN; THAT’S NO EUPHEMISM

A euphemism is the substitution of a mild, inoffensive, relatively uncontroversial phrase for another more frank expression that might offend or otherwise suggest something unpleasant to the audience. Some euphemisms are intended to amuse, while others are created to mislead or at least put a positive spin on events. Euphemisms can also be used in…

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MY SPAM IS BETTER THAN YOUR SPAM

This post is dedicated to Tilly Bud, who gets the most interesting spam, of which I have always been slightly envious. Mine tends to be all too predictable; Viagra punters, dating-for-over-50s, ‘how to pump your tyres’ (???) and so on … but this morning I got a piece of spam that is pure poetry, quite…

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BLUSHING, HAEMORRHOIDS AND NECTACOTS

Life at the salon is positively hectic, with Johannesburg women flocking in to be transformed into ‘beach babes’ for the holidays. The stylists are working at a hectic pace and I am exhausted by the end of the day and welcome my homecoming, when I can slump into a garden chair and enjoy my glass…

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MUTTERING ABOUT MUSING

My gerberas are bursting into bloom. No recipe; they just pop up every year. This is cress ready for harvesting. There is no recipe; you simply get your friend Sue to bring you some seeds from England, fling the seeds into soil and wait for them to sprout. Then you pick them and put them…

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I BEEN PLAYIN’ WITH BEANS

Green beans grow on the unpromising-sounding Phaseolus vulgaris vine; if we allow ourselves to ignore the nauseating name this vegetable could be one of the most important additions to our diet. Look at the info I found on nutritionandyou.com: Health benefits of Green beans Fresh green beans are very low in calories (31 kcal per…

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DECEMBER IN MY KITCHEN

Ah, December and summer madness reigns supreme. Despite dire warnings from the finance gurus, people are spending like there’s no tomorrow. Even crazier is their behaviour in traffic, every lunatic and his dog seem to be on the roads. Mercifully, from next week they will begin their pilgrimage to the coast to infuriate the locals…

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