There was an Old Person of Putney,
Whose food was roast spiders and chutney,
Which he took with his tea,

 within sight of the sea,
That romantic Old Person of Putney.”

Edward Lear, English artist, writer; known for his ‘literary nonsense’ & limericks 


It seems that Mercury is, in fact, in retrograde, despite my having solved the problems of my non-working kitchen appliances. My email account appears to have been hacked and now my inbox is attempting to re-download each and every email I have ever received. This has made me quite hysterical and – with an editing deadline looming – I escaped to my kitchen and cooked. As one does to stave off a heart attack.

My foodie friend Sue recently gave me a jar of her home made chutney, which I have been enjoying with everything lately. She’s been very kind and given me her recipe:


2 kg green tomatoes
3 onions chopped
500g sugar
1 litre of brown vinegar
250g raisins
250ml thinly sliced celery
1 Chilli (not chopped, just put in whole)
1 tsp finely chopped fresh ginger.
Good grind of salt & pepper
Roughly cut the tomatoes and onions and put them into a large pan with the rest of the ingredients.
Bring to a boil stirring regularly so the sugar doesn’t catch.
Reduce to a simmer
Simmer for about an hour and a half, giving it a stir every now and then.
When it starts to thicken and the mixture is a little wetter than you want, take it off the heat.
You do this as it will thicken more in the jar over time.
(I took the chilli out before putting the relish into jars)
Leave for 6 – 8 weeks, I tried after 2 and it was good but it does get yummier over time.



  1. Pleeeeease can I come for dinner? I promise to eat every sprout on my plate (I love them).

    Hope you get your email sorted; do you know how it happened?

    • No idea, Tilly, I am holding on the phone at the moment with the call-centre techie people. Have had to deleted everything that was sitting on the server, so any new mail since Saturday has disappeared *sob*

  2. That is a good chutney. Mrs Balls replaced by Mrs Greens! Yummy, I have to try this recipe, been looking for one : “Desperately Seeking Susan’s Chutney”

  3. Ack . . . computer’s on the fritz with web connections running amuk. 😦

    Mmm . . . curry and chutney. Perfect together.

    Here’s to making that retrograde renogade behave.

  4. Congrats on the catering success and what a delish looking dish, clever girl is that from up the hill. How about fresh crusty bread with a strong cheddar and a dollop of that gorgeous goo – heaven 😉

  5. I absolutely adore a good chutney, but I’ve never made my own. The best jarred chutney that I’ve ever had to date, and that I still buy occasionally, when I can afford it is “Major Grey’s Mango Chutney.” I wonder if the recipe above would approximate it if I substituted chopped mango for the tomatoes? What do you think?

  6. I’m slowly disengaging from the Old Person’s roast spiders. Ahem. The chutney looks delicious! I hope your email account gets over its problem. The other night mine said I had 46 emails when I had about four. Now you see ’em; now you don’t. It seems to have recovered from its madness. Blessings to you…

  7. Pingback: Pineapple Chutney « Spirit Lights The Way

  8. Yep. Recently had some IT problems & now I’ve signed up for IT Anonymous…, well., I would if they had one 🙂 I never knew anything could send me off into a cold swet & hand wringing mess wanting…, no… make that *needing* to ring up my Mr & make him come home from work early & fix the dam thing (it seriously didn’t make any sense to me that he just said “Oh, I’ll look at it for you when I get home OK”…. what the….!!!! didn’t he realise my computer didn’t work……
    apparently not 😉
    Nothing else for it. IT Anon here I come.

  9. Mmmmm…. me loviez chutney!!
    We Indians make a lot of those with coconut as the main ingredient.. and with tomato/coriander/chilli (red) as some of the possible variables… the list is endless! And so is my love for chutney! 🙂

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