There are some blogs I follow in awe, so impressed by their content that I sneak away, like a voyeur, without ever leaving comment. There’s an Italian girl who posts her photographs of the most exquisite interiors, there’s a florist in Germany who has a singular talent of being one step ahead in floral design, there are graphic design blogs from Japan … I won’t list them all. One blog I visit from time to time is written by a group of young British amateur film-makers. They tap into the world of alternative movies and feature new films. Much of it is way beyond me and, most of the time, I can’t understand what on earth the film is about. Their recent feature just shocked me to the core.

“The Human Centipede” has to be the most horrifying film ever made. Most disturbing for me was the question of what sort of mind had conceived of a plot where a deranged surgeon sews his victims, mouth-to-bum with other victims, to create a great big worm.

I was so upset I had to have a tot of the cooking sherry in my morning coffee and go out into the garden to think about more pleasant movies. I contemplated a film about my own life: Dame Judy Dench would star as me, in floaty ensembles, leading a very busy life and rushing about attending poetry readings in beautiful buildings.

Reality soon hit home and I had to concede that it would more likely be Brenda Blethyn starring, in an egg-stained velour track suit; pushing a shopping trolley down the detergent aisle of our local Shoprite.

Oh well, the daydream was a nice interlude, best I get myself ready to tackle the weeds in the rose garden.



  1. Fellow explorer! The problem with running into that sort of weirdness is how it sticks in the brain like bubblegum on the bottom of a shoe on a hot day. Hope the garden cleansed and purged.

    Go for Judy Dent and write the script you want, Cin. One time I was curious about script writing and googled “An Officer and a Gentleman”. I went over the first few pages of the script, then downloaded the movie. I was amazed at how exact it was. I thought directors and actors took liberties galore, but not in this one.

    I decided script writing is too detailed for me. I would not care if it was a Gucci purse or a Farenti clutch. (Don’t look that up – I invented it.)

    Anyway, now that you are starting your day, I’m off to bed.

  2. I made the fatal mistake of clicking on your link. Man, but that is really sick. Makes me wonder what they were smoking to come up with an idea like that.

    I can picture you in floaty ensembles, but in an egg-stained velour track suit? Never! *shudder*

  3. Judy Dench . . .
    Wonderful casting
    She’s a bit older
    And will be older still
    By the time it’s time
    To tell your story
    Still . . .
    A young Judy Dench
    A timeless Judy Dench
    Wonderful casting, indeed

  4. Heavens! Aren’t there enough atrocities still happening in the world that people don’t have to conjure up new ideas for some future would-be world power or sicko dictator to try out on whichever race or culture is deemed de trop at the time?

    I saw Helen Mirren recently in the Last Station, a film about Tolstoy’s final year of life. I think she is an amazing actor but I can never think of her without remembering the Cook, the Thief, his Wife and her Lover – a pretty horrible movie (content-wise) but incredibly well acted.

    MO, but I think Judy Dench would manage the egg-stained velour track suit as well as she would the floaty ensembles

  5. ….hey girl, you never cease to amaze me…just when I think I have you down pat….you come from another corner with something new….have a goody weekend you hear….

  6. I think I was VERY smart in not clicking the link you’ve posted… And haflp1nt’s comment just confirmed that! 🙂

    By the way Cin, Judy Dench would be the PERFECT cast… just last night, we watched Shakespeare in Love, where she played Queen…So the image is kinda fresh in my head 🙂
    And now you’ve gotten me thinking on what kinda movie would I make (if ever I were to!) 🙂 .. Maybe some fantasy stuff where I can transform myself into a butterfly.. something like that.. 🙂

  7. Oh puke. the human centipede haunts me this year and i haven’t even seen it. its a constant discussion in my office. the sequel is due out this year as it’s developed enough cult status even though it went straight to dvd in a lot of places

  8. Chilling movie … not yours, theirs … great post. Might actually be a productive exercise for us to do: think of a movie of our life. If we could stay away from the grandious, we might learn something about ourselves. I just might work with this … 🙂

    Happy Monday, Cin. Have a great week …

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